useless me!!!

yesterday night i get a call...
a call from an unknown number..
tot who will call me with those num...
yuan lai is darr  darr...

noe wad he told me?
"dear, my laptop and handphone were stolen..."
"........har??"
i tot i listen it wrongly...
the fact is darr really lost his hp and laptop yesterday and he ady report to the police...
but they say will help him find but no guarantee...

haiz...i was so worry about him the whole night...
but i cant do anything else beside waiting him to call me...
i cant contact dao him...
i feel i m so useless...
when something happen to him i cant give help...

for the whole night i cant even sleep well....
i m thinking wad can i do...

this morning...for the first time i contact his house to find his dad personally...
cause everytime when i talk with his parents he will he there also...
luckily he remember to contact his dad also...
a feeling of relief start to appear in my heart...

then i ask dao benny that he is also at kampar right now...
he say he can try to help me to go find darr darr and borrow him one hp to use for this mean time...
so at least i can contact dao him...
hope benny will find dao him ler...
really appreciate that benny is willing to help...
thx ya!!^^

now i just can wait him to contact me...
hope he will be alright...
i miss him so much...

the feeling is still there

finally manage to open dao my blogspot...
really gek sam la with the line here...
suka suka it will block some of the page i want to access..

today again is sunday...
but not a lovely want cause i m overloaded with test and assignment..
chem test coming soon..i so sked dat i cant do well again..
haiz...
study study study till i wan sot liao...
wen is my holiday coming??

hmm...few days ago really not in a good mood...
perhaps the thing that i try to put down haven been put down at all...
i was just lying to myself dat i m ok and i m not sked for wad had happen previously...
till yesterday i ny noe dat yuan lai nothing have been forgotten by me..
the situation...the feeling...all are still fresh in my mind...
i m a coward...i just keep run away from the thing...
i tot dat if i dun say out and keep in my heart..nothing will remind me bout that...
the thing will be gone as i dun remember it...
i m so wrong...all this while i just dun dare to face the truth...
it really bring on big impact to me..

thx darr darr yesterday keep listening to wad i say...
all the thing i sked..my feeling...
thx for your understanding and the way u comfort me...
i feel calmer now...
maybe i cant forget the thing now...
but at least it won affect my feeling much now...
give me some time..
i will let it dissapear slowly in my life...

moody mooncake festival

真的只是有时候，莫名的心情不好，不想和任何人说话，只想一个人静静的发呆。 真的只是有时候，突然觉得心情烦躁，看什么都觉得不舒服，心里闷的发慌，拼命想寻找一个出口。 真的只是有时候，发现身边的人都不了解自己，面对着身边的人，突然觉得说不出话。 真的只是有时候，感觉自己与世界格格不入，曾经一直坚持的东西一夜间面目全非。 真的只是有时候，突然很想逃离现在的生活，想不顾一切收拾自己简单的行李去流浪。 真的只是有时候，别人突然对你说，我觉得你变了，然后自己开始百感交集。 真的只是有时候，希望时间为自己停下，就这样和喜欢的人地老天荒。 真的只是有时候，在自己脆弱的时候，想一个人躲起来，不愿别人看到自己的伤口。 真的只是有时候，突然很想哭，却难过的哭不出来。 真的只是有时候，夜深人静的时候，突然觉得寂寞深入骨髓。 真的只是有时候，明明自己心里有很多话要说，却不知道怎样表达。 真的只是有时候，觉得自己其实一无所有，仿佛被世界抛弃。 真的只是有时候，明明自己身边很多朋友，却依然觉得孤单。 真的只是有时候，很想放纵自己，希望自己彻彻底底醉一次 。 真的只是有时候，自己的梦想很多，却力不从心。 真的只是有时候，常常找不到事情，无聊的无所适从。 真的只是有时候，突然找不到自己，把自己丢了。 真的只是有时候，心里突然冒出一种厌倦的情绪，觉得自己很累很累。 真的只是有时候，看不到自己未来的样子，迷茫的不知所措。 真的只是有时候，发现自己一夜之间长大了。 真的只是有时候，听到一首老歌，就突然想起一个人。 真的只是有时候，别人误解了自己有口无心的一句话，心里郁闷的发慌。 真的只是有时候，常常在回忆里挣扎，有很多过去无法释怀。 真的只是有时候，渴望别人的关怀，渴望一份简单的快乐。 真的只是有时候，看着时间一点点流逝，自己却无能为力..............

look at this article...
feel like some of it just describing my feeling now...
i feel so down right now...

2010 d mooncake festival...
i spend the whole night alone in my room...
no feeling to go out celebrate with fren..
my 1st time to celebrate this festival like this...

i m damn not happy now...
but who will understand it?
ya...only my laptop will understand it...
cause it is the one i m facing the whole night...

not even a single person get to know my feeling now..
haiz...

life after raya holiday

2nd day in uni after the raya holiday..
again...my busy life start...
test is coming soon...
and my assignment later need present liao...

now here raining liao o...
and i 4get to bring my jaket out..
now so damn cold leh me!!!

2ml is mooncake festival leh...
but too bad cant at house celebrate with my dear family and frenss..
1st time celebrate this festival alone outside...
hmm...feel so sad!!!

miss my darr darr a...
he is at kampar o now...
starting the new semester liao...
hope to c him soon...

boring la....
kolej dere online so damn sucks leh...
at night sure cant on dao want..
sumore heard dao fren say maybe fb will b blocked liao tim...
really zadao leh...
thinking of my line in future here...
ny one word to say...CHAM!!!

haixz...sien sien sien!!!

i need to leave again

i started to pack again...
aarrgghh!!! hate doing this la...
cause it is reminding me that i m going bek to uni soon...
mean i m leaving my house liao...
back to a place that everything i need to be on myself...
dun like this feeling...

2ml i will go kl liao...
anyway..dad is fetching me there...
stop at my uncle house 1st...
then sunday morning ny get back to hostel...
hmm...quite mafan want need dad to send me back..
but too bad there is no one accompany-ing me going back and my dad is worry bout dat...
so he has to fetch me down and rush back the next day...
quite tiring for him...

thinking about uni...
hmm..my study life gonna start again...
mean there is tonnes of assignment, homework and test waiting ahead for me!!!
really no mood lo!!

one more thing i hate is need to do cleaning all over the room after i left there for 2 weeks...
can you imagine the dust all over the room...
yuckss!!!
gonna be a tiring day for me on sun...
cause beside cleaning i still need prepare myself to study again...

starting to miss darr darr liao...
cause duno when can i meet him after uni reopen...
hope it wont be too long^^

n all my frenz...
gambateh a!!! waiting for the next gathering with u all during semester break..

updating-gathering

yesterday...again i had my idiot and me gang gathering...
finally i get to see jin jin...lol..
miss her so much..
but who know she ny got one night time free to hang out with us...

went for tc yesterday...
again we take many silly pictures...
no doubt...our favourite hobby taking pictures...
really sot sot...

yesterday..so ngam..meet darr darr at tc also...
he was there with his fren...
so funny...
i m walking table from table to chat with his frenz...
lol...

anyway..yesterday i also jusr rushed back from kl...
went to kl cause my uncle having house warming at his new apartment...
damn nice d design in his house...
great time chatting along with all my relatives...

not to forget...
on saturday there is some unhappy thing happen to me...
this bring about nightmare to me...
and it will always fresh in my mind i think...
but i will try to be optimistic...

hmm...there is few more days left for me to be at house...
gonna appreciate this few days...
cause i gonna miss here again when i go back kl...

waiting for another gathering also!!!^^

steamboat+sing k

hmm..yesterday really have a great time...
cause i met with fren that i din c them for a long time liao...
chee siang and wan lin...
really din c them much after i finish my stpm...
miss them so much...

anyway...
yesterday we had a great time..
going for steamboat session and sing k session...
at 1st we planned to go beserah for steamboat..
how noe they din open..
so we changed to taste cafe again..
haha..
eat til so ful leh us...
cant even finish wad we take..
but we having a great chatting time also during the dinner...

then we changed second place..
went for sing k...
at the new karaoke centre...
new century...
hmm..the place there is so damn big leh..
even the small room nia can accomodate more than 10 i think...
but the price is kinda expensive as the song there is quite old lu...
long time din sing k liao me...
sing til so enjoy leh..
think wanna go again before i go back...

then finally the photo session...
haha...take many photo yesterday i think..
by professional photographer- chee siang...
wait for the upload of those pic o!!!^^

miss the other fren also..
hope to miss them before i back to upm o!!!^^

outing with darr darr

hmm...feel so happy today..
cause i got out wit darr darr today...
long time din c him face to face liao...
cause both of us also so busy during study week...

now finally c dao him liao...
darr darr seem to be more thin liao..
not just i say..even his mum also nag him bout that...
hmm...c dao also sam tong...
hope he can gain back his weight during this holiday lu...

today go for movie with him...
watched piranha..
indeed it was a nice movie..
but it was just too short...
seem like din get dao the point of the movie after watching it...
heard sis say maybe being cut liao..
duno lu...

then after movie..
we went for lunch at kenny rogger...
hmm..i keep on put thing give him eat leh...
wan let him fat back..haha

anyway...i  get a couple cup from darr darr as present leh...
hmm...so happy...

the cup is fully glass wan o...
not she de to use it cause very nice...
and i sked i will break it too...
maybe just will take and put it dere as decoration lu...
let me c dao d cup jiu like c dao darr darr lidat...

hmm...hope for the next outings with darr darr during this holiday o!!^^

assignment in progress

darr darr is on the way back to ktn now...
hmm...so happy cause finally he wont be far far from me liao...
i miss him so much...
cant wait to spend my time with him!!!^^

anyway...
now i m in my progress of doing my titas assignment...
my title this time is about the peranakan india which is known as Chitty and found in Melacca...
wish i can finish it by 2ml..
so that the time left over i can enjoy my holiday well...
as more and more ppl are coming back for their holiday also...

the 1st outing i gonna do i think is on this wednesday ba..
ady booked ticket for piranha...
hmm..going with darr darr and sis...
sumore still got my cousin and maybe lum and his gf gua...
hmm...see-ing the trailer seem like so nice the movie...
gonna have a look on it definitely...

coming activity are still planning..
cause it seem quite difficult to follow all ppl d time...
as all of us are studying in different places...
do hope the time can be suit to the majority la..

not to 4get...
i got kinda miss my uni life and my fren in uni...
cz most of time i m hanging around with u all wen i m in uni...
waiting to go back to c wad u all bring for me!!^^ haha

lastly..hope to c most of my frenz during this holiday la...
cause damn long din hang out with u all liao...
and after this holiday i think need till our sem break ny can meet again liao...

hopefully!!!

home sweet home

finally after one month away from hauz...
i m now on9-ing at my home sweet home...
the feeling is so good...
cause i miss here so much...

this time i will spend bout 2 weeks here before i get myself back to upm again...
hmm...this time sure gonna meet my darr darr and all my dear frenz here...
we have been separated for so long leh...
miss the time we were hanging out 2gether....

this holiday seem to be a busy holiday for me...
cause i still got assignment to settle...
and i have tonnes of notes to read for my test 2 which is coming soon after this holiday....
sumore..i still have to spend my time to go out with everyone i miss so much!!
hmm..cause after this maybe we nid wait till semester break ny can meet liao...

wish everyone have a good time in this holiday o...
and my dear coursemates...i miss u all o...c ya!!^^

being cheated again

too bad...my kolej line cant let me on9 again whenever i m free...
so now...have to on9 in the library again...

after 2ml d class then i can again be in my sweet sweet home liao...
feel so happy...cause can pause the suffering life here..

yesterday..have a meeting about our kolej want..
saying that we nid to move back to our actual kolej after this raya holiday...
wah...very guo fen lo...
cause is without any renovation done want le....
feel like being cheated again...

when the first day we came...
they told us that our actual kolej is renovating...
we need to tumpang at ppl place for one semester...
ok..we accept it...
then now without any renovation ask us to move back again...
what the!!!
tot all of us are so free meh...
one semester havent finish dy nid move again..
then later when they want to renovate we need to move out again...
really feel so damn unlucky la..
y ppl can get such nice kolej but we nid to move here and there!!!


finally the decision for the meeting is all of us strongly stand that we dont want to move back after raya...
we will only move back there by next semester...

hope that time they will at least do some improvement to our kolej la...
if not i really duno how i should stay inside...

anyway...i m going home 2ml..
miss all my friends so much leh...
hope can meet all of them...

hmm..i also miss darr darr very much...
hmm..but he will only be back in ktn by 6th sept..
want to meet him so so so much!!!
cant wait liao @.@